Somehow Stewart Lee managed to forge on without me for a further three series until some fool cancelled the show. The subsequent Daveless series are also all available on the BBC iPlayer.
Sunday, 19 April 2020
Stewart Lee's Comedy ̶V̶e̶h̶i̶c̶l̶e̶
I'm not in episode five of Stewart Lee's Comedy Vehicle, Religion, but I make a return in the last episode of the first series, Comedy.
Somehow Stewart Lee managed to forge on without me for a further three series until some fool cancelled the show. The subsequent Daveless series are also all available on the BBC iPlayer.
Somehow Stewart Lee managed to forge on without me for a further three series until some fool cancelled the show. The subsequent Daveless series are also all available on the BBC iPlayer.
Wednesday, 15 April 2020
Twitter Twatter #81
March 2020 on Twitter:
Ah yes, the three genders. pic.twitter.com/WLEZg4H9ge— yeah ok (@poutinesmoothie) February 23, 2020
Just watched a half a dozen live @CornershopHQ videos in succession with my one-year-old son sat on my lap. He was enthralled. I think he might be a little bit in love with @TjinderSingh.— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 2, 2020
Pushing her off that cliff again and again...— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 3, 2020
"Because of the unique way that the BBC is funded..." https://t.co/waX7mfjajX— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 3, 2020
Puts things in perspective. https://t.co/8GJ8R2mwbt— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 3, 2020
1) Journey's End— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 4, 2020
2) The Parting of the Ways
3) Last of the Time Lords
4) Doomsday
5) The Doctor Falls
6) The Name of the Doctor
7) The Wedding of River Song
8) The Big Bang
9) The Timeless Children
10) Hell Bent
11) The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos
12) Death in Heaven https://t.co/WeixJgrWjC
*whispers* Horus, they’re lesbians https://t.co/UbxBj8xTPv— Alex de Campi (@alexdecampi) March 5, 2020
RETWEET if you want another movie from this crew. Some of the best people I’ve ever known. Let the fans be heard! #StarTrek. pic.twitter.com/5WwrfDwlEP— Chris Doohan (@ChrisDoohan) March 5, 2020
One of the greatest toys of all time. #mask pic.twitter.com/vUkkj1oJMF— Toybox Soapbox (@ToyboxSoapbox) March 4, 2020
Boris Johnson:— David Schneider (@davidschneider) March 9, 2020
“The government is fully prepared to deal with the coronavirus. Thorough measures have been put in place. There is no cause for concern”
In unrelated news: https://t.co/o7dNphQdy0
Instances where the NHS doesn't get 'whatever it needs':— Dr Rosena Allin-Khan (@DrRosena) March 8, 2020
- Cancer diagnosis
- Mental health provision
- Emergency departments
- Repairs and maintenance
- Social care
- Staff pay
- GPs
- Nurse recruitment
- Support staff numbers
- Elective surgery
- Bedshttps://t.co/tHFEVdOq0Q
They're waxdroids from a malfunctioning motoring museum.— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 9, 2020
On the plus side, we have 49 years to prepare... https://t.co/OhcM32otoK— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 11, 2020
It's not and it is. It was written as @DoctorWhoNY Barnaby, but drawn as @BarnabyEdwards - that way both are honoured.— Tony Lee (@mrtonylee) March 11, 2020
We Barnaby Edwardses have terrible trouble meeting because of the Blinovitch Limitation Effect, so it’s kind of Tony to combine us in this way. 😉— Barnaby Edwards (@BarnabyEdwards) March 11, 2020
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 11, 2020
The less you know, the better you sleep. RUSSIAN PROVERB— Quite Interesting Facts (@qikipedia) March 13, 2020
Professor John Ashton, the former Director of Public Health, has just ripped in to the government, saying he is “embarrassed” and the government have failed. Absolutely damning. #BBCQT pic.twitter.com/4T02kqLsBe— Rachael Swindon #UTFC (@Rachael_Swindon) March 12, 2020
Connery: You Only Live Twice— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 13, 2020
Moore: The Spy Who Loved Me
Dalton: Licence To Kill
Brosnan: Tomorrow Never Dies
Craig: Skyfall. https://t.co/UeQQYpzYoU
It is the best Bond film for me by a country mile.— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 14, 2020
I'm in at least one of these. #TheXFiles https://t.co/jjikagxDIm— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 14, 2020
And this is why is wish I could grow a dog. https://t.co/2VHA0n2y3g— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 15, 2020
Classic Bond scenes:— QUANTUM OF SILLINESS: The Book, out now! (@TheTchaikovsky) March 15, 2020
Blofeld admires the view from the smoking area of his local IKEA in #DiamondsAreForever. pic.twitter.com/9aUhbcC2fg
— Hari Kunzru (@harikunzru) March 16, 2020
"Pendragon Castle"— Tom Holmes (@TomHolmes_Photo) March 16, 2020
Pendragon Castle is a ruin located in Mallerstang Dale, Cumbria, south of Kirkby Stephen, and close to the hamlet of Outhgill. Situation inside the Yorkshire Dales National Park it stands above a bend in the River Eden, overlooked by Wild Boar Fell to the South pic.twitter.com/pdo8rLrwsX
— poorly drawn bands (@badbanddrawing) March 12, 2020
It’s OK everyone, it’ll be over in another 39 episodes. Although I never saw this twist coming, for sure... pic.twitter.com/6GttN8LKGM— The Industrious Ant (@superwonderstar) March 17, 2020
Hey #joinin gang! Sending peaceful wishes to you all and hoping that, like Jake here, you’re all managing to stay calm through these challenging times! ❤️ pic.twitter.com/567ZYk197G— Sarah Williams (@uppityfabulous) March 17, 2020
Love & Monsters would still be a joy all day, every day. https://t.co/xiiT5Cp0E6— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 18, 2020
There's a Scottish gin on the market which is Carbon Positive and made from peas instead of wheat. Each bottle reduces the carbon footprint created by normal gin making. Save the planet, drink more gin... https://t.co/NEhoqXjsYp— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 18, 2020
Levels of nitrogen dioxide pollution fell drastically in parts of Italy — a direct result of the country closing due to #COVID19 . Venetians say the water hasn't been this clear in 60 years. Air quality and pollution continues to clear. Some refreshing positive news for your TL🌎 pic.twitter.com/PxOAFV8ajd— ë°” 네 사 🌙 (@finessabae) March 17, 2020
I can’t personally offer much at the moment, but I’d like to do something. Please send me your showreels and I’ll watch them all. I want to know as many of you as possible for when the world gets back to normal. Also if anyone needs someone to chat to my DMs are open. pic.twitter.com/xR7T1sbNHI— Casting Assistant (@CastingAsst) March 17, 2020
Here’s Group E in the #WorldCupofJamesBond. Top two go through. Please retweet once you’ve voted for your favourite. Spread the word!— For Your Films Only (@benpeyton007) March 18, 2020
In 1999, a gang of thieves was forced to do community service along a road in Rotherham. The next spring the daffodils coming into bloom spelt out the words ‘shag’ and ‘bollocks’.— Quite Interesting Facts (@qikipedia) March 20, 2020
He doesn't think it will be over in 12 weeks. He thinks that in 12 weeks everyone will have forgotten he said it would be over in 12 weeks.— Jonny Morris (@jonnymorris1973) March 20, 2020
Person feels ill, lungs fill with fluid, trip to the hospital, stabilised, test positive for COVID-19, sent home to recuperate.— Barnaby Edwards (@BarnabyEdwards) March 20, 2020
Cost in US: $34,927.43
Cost in UK: £0
This virus is a wake-up call to anyone who thinks selling off the NHS is a good idea. https://t.co/tDQ1ravMgu
People who grew up outside of cities tend to have a better sense of direction.
— Quite Interesting (@qikipedia) March 21, 2020
Laura wants to speak to the virus’ manager https://t.co/NYnj3X6N8n
— Matt Gabriele (@prof_gabriele) March 20, 2020
My pal got a text from her quarantined Dad yesterday.
— Mark Millar (@mrmarkmillar) March 21, 2020
Dad: SOS
Pal: OMG! What's up?
Dad: I need beer and Wispa bars. Can you leave on doorstep?
She took some to his house & found 72 cans of beer & a pile of Wispas outside. SHE WASN'T EVEN THE ONLY PERSON HE SENT THIS TOO!
I wrote one of the top three books about Dr Horrible's Sing-Along Blog: https://t.co/00iQN4JBGl, still available.
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 21, 2020
If anyone doubts my BF credentials, I'm screaming on the cover of Graceless II...
Case closed...@ganymedetitan @mumoss pic.twitter.com/qFR4ch1huS
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 23, 2020
Victoria Derbyshire - What do you think of people ignoring the advice to social distance themselves?
— Haggis_UK 🇬🇧 🇪🇺 (@Haggis_UK) March 23, 2020
Prof. Grasselli(Milan University) - It's like collective suicide... if we let the #coronavirus go, then we can expect more deaths than in WW2... #COVIDー19 #coronavirusuk pic.twitter.com/ECe9Uhcdo7
For reference when we’re putting together our new society after this is all over. pic.twitter.com/OXLciEcfJ1
— Melanie Tait (@MelanieTait) March 22, 2020
Data reminds everyone why it's important to #StayHome during efforts to #FlattenTheCuve.#StarTrek pic.twitter.com/ATgfuvCnNw
— TrekCore.com 🖖 (@TrekCore) March 23, 2020
@avpgalaxy https://t.co/hRwmLqLoD0
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 23, 2020
I misread that as John Major.
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 23, 2020
Fun fact: Netflix has a built-in psychopath test! pic.twitter.com/fmlwzr6Hiw
— Jesse Thorn (@JesseThorn) March 24, 2020
"Lockdown Day 1 - Beckside"
— Tom Holmes (@TomHolmes_Photo) March 24, 2020
Now we are technically in 'lockdown' in the UK I decided I would try and keep somewhat creative and post a photo a day to my social media. Some will be new photos, some will be old. Some will be shot on my phone, some with the DSLR. pic.twitter.com/OkDfqn7ZoY
It is a bold stance for someone seeking re-election.
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 24, 2020
Incoming message... #DoctorWho pic.twitter.com/lTXziuzWVQ
— Doctor Who on BBC America (@DoctorWho_BBCA) March 25, 2020
Incoming message... #DoctorWho pic.twitter.com/lTXziuzWVQ
— Doctor Who on BBC America (@DoctorWho_BBCA) March 25, 2020
Lockdown Day 3 - "Swan Inn"
— Tom Holmes (@TomHolmes_Photo) March 26, 2020
The Swan Inn in the middle of Carleton In Craven (North Yorkshire, UK) on a glorious sunny spring day.
Follow/Like for daily uplifting landscape photos. pic.twitter.com/n6gAvJpBT3
The best prime minister we never had. ❤️ https://t.co/YV4xBaCs66
— Louise Jameson (@Lou_Jameson) March 26, 2020
Uganda has the best Coronavirus PSA. pic.twitter.com/841962DR1V
— Kevin Sieff (@ksieff) March 25, 2020
To keep active through this, let’s dance together. pic.twitter.com/oLy7RgKogE
— Joe Tracini (@joetracini) March 24, 2020
Radio Times covers for "Porridge" are *fantastic. pic.twitter.com/j3Qy5PWpAR
— Walter Dunlop (@waltydunlop) March 26, 2020
“The government should have given funding to existing ventilator manufacturers, and existing companies like us.”
— BBC Newsnight (@BBCNewsnight) March 25, 2020
Andrew Raynor of MEC Medical, a medical parts manufacturer, says “nothing” happened when he contacted the govt offering to make #Covid19 ventilators#Newsnight pic.twitter.com/n79KVpENbW
Just wanted to send love to all those self isolating. 13 month old Jake sends grins to you all #JoinIn #joinin pic.twitter.com/aUex1HezDl
— Sarah Williams (@uppityfabulous) March 15, 2020
#OnThisDay 1980: Steve Martin was in fine form on Parkinson. pic.twitter.com/9HedKGADD6
— BBC Archive (@BBCArchive) March 26, 2020
Ten Reasons To Watch Rose#DoctorWho #TripOfALifetime pic.twitter.com/3SNdDoqta0
— Pip (@pipmadeley) March 26, 2020
Words for “thingamajig” in other languages include ZAMAZINGO (Turkish), HIMSTERGIMS (Danish) and DINGSBUMS (German).
— Quite Interesting (@qikipedia) March 26, 2020
Lockdown Day 4 - "Brook View"
— Tom Holmes (@TomHolmes_Photo) March 27, 2020
Follow/Like for daily uplifting landscape photography. pic.twitter.com/RXrcNxnGlr
Life comes at you fast eh pic.twitter.com/5gKrUDy1FG
— Hope Worsdale (@HWorsdale) March 27, 2020
They prefer 'fam'
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 27, 2020
Type the year you turned ten into gif search. pic.twitter.com/Elc3kpZzfo
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 27, 2020
Now we've done our #clapforNHS:
— Francesca Martinez (@chessmartinez) March 26, 2020
Let's stop voting in the party who are destroying it.
Don't believe me?
Watch Dominic Cummings tell you how little the Tories care about the NHS in his own words...pic.twitter.com/OQpiqYa2Gl
Hope I didn't keep you waiting long https://t.co/h2HtaoBnPK pic.twitter.com/ewxj9nh5mK
— Pip (@pipmadeley) March 27, 2020
Buffy Season 4.
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 27, 2020
I rarely go more than a week without thinking about how this fella waves. pic.twitter.com/fUjzZLu6zV
— cluedont (@cluedont) March 27, 2020
Self Isolation Day 7. I think I’ve gone mad. #CoronaLockdown #COVID2019 #Quarantine pic.twitter.com/sgwFuGKSHQ
— James Farmer (@JamesFarmer87) March 27, 2020
When the #quarantine is over, I want to buy this man dinner. Who is he? This might be the best thing I've seen in weeks. pic.twitter.com/TfbEjLBQ7R
— Peter Shankman (@petershankman) March 27, 2020
1. Futurama
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 29, 2020
2. Doctor Who
3. Red Dwarf https://t.co/bCirQqfkfg
If you are a Dr Who person please join the challenge of posting a Dr Who photo. Just one picture, no description. Please copy the text in your status, post a picture and look at some great memories/pictures. pic.twitter.com/T890VhaGPy
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 29, 2020
Lockdown Day 5 - "Spence's Court"
— Tom Holmes (@TomHolmes_Photo) March 28, 2020
Spence's Court almshouse in Carleton In Craven (North Yorkshire, UK)
Follow/Like for daily uplifting landscape photography. pic.twitter.com/0H0osrluSg
Lockdown Day 6 - "Brook View Barn"
— Tom Holmes (@TomHolmes_Photo) March 29, 2020
Farm buldings on Brook View, Carleton In Craven (North Yorkshire, UK)
Follow/Like for daily uplifting landscape photography. pic.twitter.com/uGau3OV8j3
This kind of reporting led to Brexit. Even if it rains in the UK the EU is blamed for it by the British tabloids. pic.twitter.com/RBNQLzsJuh
— Guy Verhofstadt (@guyverhofstadt) March 29, 2020
Life lesson: Be much less inhibited when cooking up names for characters pic.twitter.com/D03AatwH3f
— Simon Craven (@Simon_Craven) March 29, 2020
Lockdown Day 7 - "Village Hall"
— Tom Holmes (@TomHolmes_Photo) March 30, 2020
The Village Hall once a School and Tithe Barn, in Carleton In Craven (North Yorkshire, UK)
Follow/Like for daily uplifting landscape photography. pic.twitter.com/wI7ZnmuXbO
Released today all that time ago...
— Pulp_Nights (@Pulp_Nights) March 29, 2020
Something Changed. xhttps://t.co/WGtVXwWBMg
I know exactly how he felt. https://t.co/ghubaG7Wgk
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 30, 2020
...The Vipod Mor. https://t.co/Qk6Z8g5LZW
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 30, 2020
Passwords must be what? pic.twitter.com/frlj8bWwfl
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 30, 2020
Lockdown Day 8 - "Bridge Over The Beck"
— Tom Holmes (@TomHolmes_Photo) March 31, 2020
A big splash of spring colour surrounds the bridge of the beck in Carleton In Craven (North Yorkshire, UK)
Follow/Like for daily uplifting landscape photography. pic.twitter.com/VeIPQJlpAp
In 2004, the citizens of Ecuador synchronised their watches as part of a national ‘Campaign Against Unpunctuality’. The president’s spokesman was several minutes late to the television broadcast announcing it.
— Quite Interesting (@qikipedia) March 31, 2020
There's one in The Enemy Of The World, so they must have been invented at some point before 2018... pic.twitter.com/IgmPYzS7vI
— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) March 31, 2020
hold on a second... pic.twitter.com/Skg6BTeCjJ
— josé | IT'S PCAP DAY ✨ (@timelesstwelve) March 30, 2020
Friday, 10 April 2020
Stewart Lee's Global Financial Crisis
Another day, another episode of Stewart Lee's Comedy Vehicle. This time it's episode four, Global Financial Crisis, I have a more substantial role in this one. I speak actual words.
I am that vain, arrogant man.
I am that vain, arrogant man.
Tuesday, 7 April 2020
Saturday, 4 April 2020
Stewart Lee's Political Correctness
I'm not in Television, episode two of Stewart Lee's Comedy Vehicle, but don't that put you off, it's still very good. Then along comes episode three, Political Correctness. Again, I'm in this only really very fleetingly.
Wednesday, 1 April 2020
Insecure Writer's Support Group #4
The co-hosts this time around are Diane Burton, JH Moncrieff, Anna @ Emaginette, Karen @ Reprobate Typewriter, Erika Beebe and Lisa Buie-Collard. So, thanks to them.
Every month there is an (optional) question and this month it is: what's your favourite piece of punctuation?
I'd have do go with either the interrobang or-
April Fool!
No, of course it isn't. The question couldn't really be anything other than: "So, in this time when our world is in crisis with the covid-19 pandemic, our optional question this month is: how are things in your world?"
Crikey! What a month. OK, who ordered the global pandemic?
I'm currently in isolation as I would imagine a great many of you are. I originally isolated because my wife was in an at risk category, but we both started showing symptoms. We had headaches that just wouldn't clear, very snotty noses, no sense of smell and a dry cough, but so far no fever. It wasn't much fun.
I saw lots of people complaining of boredom, which irked me because I have a one-year-old and therefore no more free time than before. Still no time to write. While people whinged about having to watch boxsets or learn to paint, I resented them a bit. At the same time, I discovered that I was a key worker, and so while everyone else worked from home I would be expected to brave the outdoors. Before the election I was considered unskilled, now I'm key to success of our nation's efforts to beat coronavirus. Nobody tells you that you are a key worker until they want you to do something and this is not a job that pays well enough to warrant risking your life. I was worried that my 'joke job' would get my family killed.
While we waited inside, we saw people hoarding food, panic buying, fighting over toilet roll, vandalising ambulances, stealing hand sanitiser from hospitals, robbing schools, throwing away perfectly good food and wilfully ignoring the scientific advice to prevent the spread of the virus. Maybe we don't deserve to survive this.
My isolation is due to end this Friday. Wish me luck.
In the meantime...
- Don't go out if you don't have to. Work from home if you can.
- Wash your hands more often and for at least twenty seconds.
- Don't buy more of anything than you need.
- Don't be selfish. Think of others.
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