Twitter Twatter #23

September 2015

Beats a hard kick in the face

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 2, 2015

@uppityfabulous people, listen to your teacher.

— Paul Sahre(@psahre) September 1, 2015

Voted "best"

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 2, 2015

@uppityfabulous More than can be said in a tweet. Design is known as "visualcommunications" for a reason.

— Josh Smith (@joshsmithnyc) September 1, 2015

Thanks for watching, #Futurama slave army!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 2, 2015

@uppityfabulous I agree good communication is vital for all jobs especially in those that involve a lot of networking

— Grayson Perry (@Alan_Measles) September 2, 2015

See you on some other channel

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 2, 2015

@ltMeansHope I'm going to travel faster than the speed of light and hope someone notices...

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 2, 2015

Nothing is more indicative of white supremacy than the fact that the phrase "BlackLives Matter" is controversial.

— Marc Lamont Hill (@marclamonthill) August 31, 2015

It just won't stay dead!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 3, 2015

"It's Force Friday! A new range of #StarWars Merchannounced today! Let's start with these great Polo Shirts" How demographics change...

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 4, 2015

Watch, Rinse, Repeat

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 4, 2015

imiss the summer pic.twitter.com/QdOtJ5uN80

— David O'Doherty (@phlaimeaux) September 4, 2015

Apply directly to the foreclaw

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 4, 2015

Ever wondered what a Migraine is like in practical terms? Here is what it means to me. #migraine2015 @MigraineTrust pic.twitter.com/4jqRl2eY7J

— Andy Bloor (@ajbloor) September 7, 2015

Last known transmission of the Hubble Telescope

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 8, 2015

#Hunted is a surprising departure for #WatsonAndOliver

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 10, 2015

The Proud Result of Prison Labor

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 11, 2015

"DearCustomer, We have up to 25% off selected adult shoes..." How adult can shoes get?

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 11, 2015

It Makes a Nice Sandwich

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 11, 2015

I'm watching #NowAndAgain. It's even better than I remember. Is it too late for a season two? @EricRClose @HaysbertDennis @HeatherMatarazz

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 11, 2015

0100100001101001

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 11, 2015

An extra 20 minsof walking in the rain to get her to sleep & this is what I get! #howrude #babymiddlefinger #momlife pic.twitter.com/7Hj1xJaBVi

— Jane Vassiliadis(@janevassiliadis) July 8, 2015

The Robots are Coming! The Robots are Coming!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 12, 2015

I'm just happy that now, if Labour win the next election, we can finally definitively date The Green Death. pic.twitter.com/3DCaxWKrcY

— Clayton Hickman (@claytonhickman) September 12, 2015

The flames in your TV are not part of the show

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 12, 2015

"Farleft": Often just a pejorative term for the right side of history. #JeremyCorbyn pic.twitter.com/XSZUvDz6uB

— Derrick O'Keefe (@derrickokeefe) September 12, 2015

The episode they'll be thinking about by the water cooler, but not mentioning specifically

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 12, 2015

Oh my word, Jamie Reed has resigned! @jreedmp pic.twitter.com/rVIz4I0Bgb

— Kevin Hoare (@UkuleleKev) September 12, 2015

Current eBay bid: $8.51

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 12, 2015

Beyond parody. If democracy is a 'threat' then you've got to ask about the validity of the alternative. https://t.co/mkXgT8hUrb

— Andy Bloor (@ajbloor) September 12, 2015

Collect all fifty billion!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 12, 2015

(ESP) Closed-captioned for the ESP-impaired

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 12, 2015

"Youstill don't understand what you're dealing with, do you? Perfect organism." #Alien pic.twitter.com/pEkUmSNeCc

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 13, 2015

If you can read this, thank us!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 13, 2015

#corbyn win means now piss easy to spot which newspapers are owned by non-domiciled corporatist billionaires pic.twitter.com/tWzz3vfbAt

— Tracey Jensen (@Drtraceyjensen) September 13, 2015

Now available without a prescription

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 13, 2015

Imagine if you didn't know who these men were. What the heck would you think was going on? pic.twitter.com/Ac9i2B47Qq

— Gareth Roberts (@OldRoberts953) September 13, 2015

The humans shall not defeat us

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 13, 2015

Rebirth

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 15, 2015

Apply directly to the eyes

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 15, 2015

Tying down the awkward cunt who played Mikey Forrester could be a deal-breaker. That boy is IN DEMAND. https://t.co/ueaBCGeiIB

— Irvine Welsh (@IrvineWelsh) September 15, 2015

There will be a test

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 15, 2015

Dictated but not read

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 15, 2015

Tories sniggering every time Corbynmentions a member of the public's name. At least they are real people, unlike those the DWP made up.

— MhairiBlack MP (@MhairiBlack) September 16, 2015

So #BlackMirror & @charltonbrooker were right about @David_Cameron all along... #piggate

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 21, 2015

Put on 3-D monocle now

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 16, 2015

Made you look!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 22, 2015

Progress pic.twitter.com/XY37wmC8e8

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 22, 2015

If you don't watch it, someone else will

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 22, 2015

#WorldRhinoDay My encounter with a rhino: http://t.co/Kxw6S426SV

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 22, 2015

(or similar product)

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 22, 2015

This time, it's personal

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) September 29, 2015

Six Word Sci-Fi

"See you yesterday."

And he did.

"Nethersphere's Just A Cool Name We Came Up With During A Spitball"

According to Seb in Death In Heaven.

I was approached by Robert Smith? (yes, with a question mark) to write a piece for a fanzine called The Nethersphere.

Robert Smith? has edited two volumes of Outside In, which features articles and reviews from interesting perspectives about every Doctor Who story from An Unearthly Child to Last Christmas. He asked me to have a go at one of the online scenes that preceded Series Nine and I chose the Prologue.

I wrote a blog entry, written from the perspective of a superfan of a fictional TV Show all about the exploits of the Sisterhood of Karn, a TV show called The Sisterhood Of Karn. It's incredibly geeky. My piece forms part of a larger article about the editing process that went into Outside In, the road less travelled of some rejected pieces and a new one by Mr Smith? himself.

It can be downloaded here in a format I don't fully understand or as a pdf.

Twitter Twatter #22

August 2015

More alternating tweets with Futurama opening captions:

Please rise for the #Futurama theme song

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 5, 2015

I've spent ages folding white wedding chair covers. I feel I have a real insight into the logistical difficulties of organising a Klan rally

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 5, 2015

Krafted with luv by monsters

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 5, 2015

After 23 years I'm finally watching #ArchersGoon again.

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 5, 2015

It's released on 7 December 2015...

What are the chances of @FutureShockDoc coming to DVD?

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 7, 2015

Disclaimer: Any resemblance to actual robots would be really cool

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 7, 2015

It turns out that parts of #ReturnToThePlanetOfTheApes are a surrealist masterpiece.

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 7, 2015

Federal law prohibits changing the channel

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 7, 2015

Happy #LeftHandersDay to all my southpaw brothers and sisters. pic.twitter.com/pXtUBz4YPi

— Jerry Doyle (@jerrydoyle) August 13, 2015

For proper viewing, take red pill now

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 13, 2015

Something I wrote a few years ago for #lefthandersday: http://t.co/pV4xWWB1sY

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 13, 2015

No humans were probed in the making of this episode

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 13, 2015

Yvette Cooper and Ed Balls 'flipped' homes 3 times in 2 years. Meanwhile Corbyn's expenses lowest. http://t.co/Q1RbtEXCxl #LabourLeadership

— Left Unity (@LeftUnityUK) August 13, 2015

It's pages like this that remind me why I love #MegaCityOne @2000AD pic.twitter.com/PFwK8WR9YC

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 15, 2015

Scratch here to reveal prize

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 15, 2015

#WorldPhotographyDay & #WorldHumanitarianDay on the same day. I feel double booked.

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 19, 2015

Psst... Big party at your house after the show!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 19, 2015

#fakeDWPstories #BreakingIDS pic.twitter.com/cOemVwJpKc

— FemherroidInvasion (@FrankFontaine2) August 19, 2015

Hey TiVo! Suggest this!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 20, 2015

Ion, Lion, Zion #ScientificSongs

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 20, 2015

Fun for the whole family except grandma and grandpa

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 20, 2015

#BadInFlightAnnouncements "Dueto unforeseen circumstances we will be making an unscheduled stop at Didcot Parkway"

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 21, 2015

Please turn off all cell phones and tricorders

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 21, 2015

There's not a day goes by that I don't think about this caption. pic.twitter.com/ebwtgYwLlQ

— Dan Berry (@thingsbydan) August 21, 2015

Love it or shove it

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 22, 2015

Most days #DoctorWho is a pacifist, but some days you just have to let your hair down and kill massive spiders... pic.twitter.com/B9YGOTc4Qe

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

If accidentally watched, induce vomiting.

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

All welding masks should be shaped like characters from #Futurama pic.twitter.com/Avzu3WGtEv

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

Bigfoot's choice

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

My wife tweeted questions about the important of English and Maths to celebrities to inspire her students, here are the responses...

They're isn't nothing more important than English Sarah. https://t.co/isBGaDuJWm

— Jack Whitehall (@jackwhitehall) August 25, 2015

It's like "HEEHAW" with lasers

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

@uppityfabulous and language. My English teacher was the first to try talking me out of medicine!

— Krishnan Guru-Murthy (@krishgm) August 25, 2015

When you see the robot, drink!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

@uppityfabulous what age? Assume not foreign langstudents?

— Samira Ahmed (@SamiraAhmedUK) August 25, 2015

@uppityfabulous If you can't express yourself & your ideas in good written English you won't get a chance to show what you are brilliant at.

— Samira Ahmed (@SamiraAhmedUK) August 25, 2015

Soon to be a major religion

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

@uppityfabulous englishdone helped me real good like. Me is well cabapleof talkinproper now.

— chriso'dowd (@BigBoyler) August 25, 2015

Or is it?

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

@uppityfabulous it is the language of nature - what more can I say !

— Brian Cox (@ProfBrianCox) August 25, 2015

@ProfBrianCox Brilliant! Thank you so much - really appreciate your help :)

— Sarah Holmes (@uppityfabulous) August 25, 2015

Controlling you through a chip in your butt since 1999

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

#SolveMyProblemsIn4Words Lather, rinse and repeat

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

Not affiliated with #Futurama Brass Knuckle Co.

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 25, 2015

Apparently it's #NationalDogDay somewhere, but dogs are everywhere: https://t.co/PpulsOe2XU

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 26, 2015

Known to cause insanity in laboratory mice

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 26, 2015

There's only one good reason for Quentin Letts to be trending and this isn't it. We live in hope.

— @adrianshort(@adrianshort) August 26, 2015

Now interactive! Joystick controls Fry's left ear

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 26, 2015

#LaTomatina is the biggest, reddist, tomatoiestfuck you to the starving.

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 26, 2015

Dancing space potatoes? You bet!

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 26, 2015

My review of #BlackSwan: if she had been a real swan she could have broken his arm...

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 28, 2015

Where no fan has gone before

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 28, 2015

Is David Cameron @Al_Ewing's yardstick for evil?: http://t.co/M2h3SXAqQ1

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 31, 2015

Does #Columbo ever solve a murder without a celebrity perpetrator?

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 31, 2015

A by-product of the TV industry

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 31, 2015

My reaction to every Corbynstory: 1) Read headline implying he's said something terrible. 2) Read what he actually said. 3) Agree with him.

— Ian Symes(@ianiansymes) August 31, 2015

Too hot for radio

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 31, 2015

“I’ve never read his books, but they’re mediocre”. Well I’ve actually read your article, and it’s shite. http://t.co/5QjKLBbEGe

— James Moran (@jamesmoran) August 31, 2015

You can't prove it won't happen

— David Black (@Davetweetedthis) August 31, 2015

@uppityfabulous it's always important to communicate.

— chrisshepherd (@chris__shepherd) August 31, 2015

Kickstunted

So, Arts In Entertainment is not going ahead despite some valiant efforts. The Kickstarter kickstarted well, but couldn't maintain the momentum. I want to thank those of you that contributed, the other authors and Phil Reed in particular.

Phil's own thank you is here.

I'm disappointed, but encouraged by Phil's words. Despite the not do, Arts In Entertainment represents a hell of a lot of can do. I have another writing project that I'll be launching in the next couple of weeks. It won't be a Kickstarter, but it will be incredibly geeky. And I think it's down to Phil and Arts In Entertainment that I'm even more determined to make a success of it.

The Last Day

It's the last day or so for the Arts In Entertainment Kickstarter campaign, and it's come up a little short.

Do any of you have $4,206 you don't need to hang on to? Or do 4,206 of you have $1 you would care to share?

Bad Cover Version

Phil Reed asked me to think of perks to help convince and cajole people into parting with their hard earned. I didn't come up with much of any note. Phil's response was suggest that I offer to sing the Pulp song of choice into a purchaser's answering machine. I assumed he was joking.

I was wrong.

And so when the Kickstarter went live I scrolled down the list of perks and to my horror discovered that for two hundred of your dollars I will sing a Pulp track of your choice into an answering machine of your choice.

This Is Hardcover

How cool is this?

The answer is, obviously, very. This is the current cover art designed by Mishi Hime for the book I am writing for Noiseless Chatter. To quote Phil the artwork is "subject to change before publication. Rest assured, though; it'll be brilliant." The artwork for the album was controversial and it is only right that the artwork for the book follows suit.

But it will all be for nothing if we don't meet our Kickstarter target.

Chattering

I've been interviewed on Noiseless Chatter regarding my book for Arts In Entertainment. The kickstarter is currently a little under a third funded with ten days to go. We can do this.

If you have an interest in Pulp, I'm Still Here, Titus Andronicus, Synecdoche New York, Mystery Science Theater 3000, Hatsune Miku or Streetfighter II then please consider contributing...